Considering that once all of us understand our partners.. or at least we think we do or did.. then the next step would be marriage ( and this I'm saying after all the lets live together and going around for few years to see how compatible we are.. )
Now wikipedia gives a lovely definition for Marriage
"Marriage is a personal union of individuals." This union may also be called matrimony, while the ceremony that marks its beginning is usually called a wedding and the married status created is sometimes called wedlock."
Now what is this personal union of individuals??
Is it the thought that.. from now on.. I have got someone in my life.. who would support me and let me know when things go bad.. and guide me accordingly.. be it what the circumstance.
I love the wordings they say at the Christian wedding.. " Be it for better or for worse ".
Now most religions perform a wedding ceremony to solemnize the beginning of a marriage. Some regard marriage as simply a contract, while others regard it as a sacred institution. Be it in Hinduism were marriage is seen as sacred duty that entails both religious and social obligations; were as in Islam, marriage being whenever the individuals feel ready, financially and emotionally.Then you also have the practices of Dowry. Different religion have different names for it like the bride price, Morning gifts etc. But lets not get in to that.. We can have that for another post..
Now coming back to the holy matrimony..
What if you thought you could stay with the person for the rest of your life and then you realised that he/she was not the one that you thought they were when you got married??? Differences have cropped up.This could be due finances, stress or even certain habits of the person that you thought you could handle but alas you are not.The circumstances have changed.
Then what would you do??
One of my friends who is blissfully married said to me.. "We both are independent and it is good.Because you'll not always be thinking about your every move to make sure he's there to hold your hand. "
Well guess it works.. No one wants a clingy person or a complete control freak in their life..
Now the second part of my topic..
Babies
If everything goes right.. I mean everything... OK then yes you are ready or you might already on the journey towards having a baby.. or babies.. in case you are having twins.. etc..
It will be months before they talk, walk or even sit up. They are always referred as this small , little bundle of joy..And yes like the title suggests.. Am talking about babies..Why babies you all might wonder..
Just like that..
No apparent reason.. apart from me having one .. lol..
hehe ok ok.. my mom reads this she just my be admitted to the hospital..
The whole point of writing this blog was in the past couple of weeks.. I have been across so many new born babies.. and they all are sooo cuttteee.. beautiful.. handsome.. adorable..sweeettt... awww mannn.. they are just awesome..
Well have you ever wondered what exactly the babies think???
Am adding few more baby cartoons for a glimpse into the baby world.
And now I'm waiting for the comments :)
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36 comments:
Nice thoughts shed on matrimony. I personally feel that 'acceptance' binds people and can settle any difference that is on offer...
Heh heh heh... Good cartoons! :D
Peace.
kartz
thank u..
thats what i feel as well..
hehe the cartoons are real cute arent they.. hehe hope it is close enough to what they think :)
Lol... loved the cartoons..
From a person who is married,and possible going forward into the baby mode, I have to say marriage is definitely not only about personal union, its about union of two families, and most importantly ways of thinking .
About the baby mode,as what a dad told me its takes about 2.5 years after marriage for the excitement to die, down.. funnily enough thats the point where most babies are born :D! (You do the math :) )
I cud get thru this time Ani (thru ur Id), tnxx!
haha cute post and the cartoons!! very funny :)
My mum says that Lust lasts for like 15 days after the Wedding. Gosh I hope she's wrong!
To me, Marriage is appealing BUT only if it's with someone I really really wanna spend the rest of my life with. I dunno how Arranged marriages work...some ppl meet for just 2 weeks n get married! Thats something I cant u'stand. 2 ppl will never fully know each other, even if they live together a lifetime...so how can u get married my knowing someone for few weeks? Guess, to each his own. But if I dun find the one, I'd rather stay single than being married for the sake of it.
babies...awwwww I love em! But its not all suga candy all the way when u hv a baby. I know my cousins n friends hv sleepless nites, changed lifestyles and stressful few years bringing up the baby. Its a huge committment from both the parents.
To be honest, Im not yet ready for a 2am feed followed by a 3hr baby vigil lol!
r u Ani? :)
Keshi.
Anu :
well hehe after that insight what can i say.. so are u getting ready for the baby then ;)
Keshi
thank god its working now..
yaaayy..
thank u , thannk u
i told u will do very generalised one.. i actually wanna see the response i get and then write up based on that.
well coming from a place were arranged marriage is so common.. i am mentally prepared that yes i could have an arranged marriage.. n yeh i wouldnt know much about the guy before i get married.. but then there is this hope that things wouldnt be bad and i might actually know the person i marry.. well wishful thinking but still thats a hope.. hehe
hnnmm babies.. dont know.. i love babies.. but like u said.. the whole waking up thing.. not quite sure if am ready for that..heck am not even sure if am ready for the big word.. committment..
very nice!!
it seemed to a superb mixture of ethics, sociology n lotsa fun read. keep it goin!
arunima
thank u dear..
been a while since u dropped in..
hope all is well :)
What do u wan me to say??
Welll...firstly apologies....cud n't drop in 4 quite a while...ur first line here made me read the prev post....i had to read that to get along with this..
I liked the prev one better....dunno that...maybe AGE..
Marriage n stuff i guess was something i cudn't relate much but thoroughly enjoyed..
The gamut of ur thought process seems to get better with time...
I've already told u once wen u write abt Independence day i think..
Lovely!!! Anila rocczzz!!! :)
rajesh
well have u left comments for the previous post before.. if not will love to hear what u got to say..
i jst did a very genralised post.. planning to do a detailed thing later on..
and thank u for the encouraging words.. means a lot :)
Hey... two posts on some really *serious* stuff... love, relationship, commitment, marriage, babies... phew! that's helluva lot to take in one go... but what I wonder is what got you thinking about all of these... generalised post or not...
My view on marriage is that if two people are really so much for and with each other for all the right and mutually beneficial reasons that they want a legalised attestation of them being a couple, it sounds good.
Similarly, if two individuals want to have something unique and are able, then nothing wrong in having a baby or even adopting one for that matter...
Point is it is about sharing your life because you want to... as one could say... it is not a chore to go to the airport to pick you up, it is an opportunity that I get to pick you up :)
Enjoyed both the posts :))
Marriage: You wanna cry? Take this link and watch the video…
The Rose.
Dowry: A brand new house in London, an Airplane and a Porsche would be ok. Lol.
Babies: They are ‘a w e s o m e’ as me init?
Ps: I can see a new picture!
Anish
thank u..
well one has to think about these things some point or the other in one's life..
i have got my best friend getting married soon.. and been talkin to her for couple of weeks and getting her marriage updates.. so one ends up thinking stuff..
hehe i dont know how "serious" these stuff is.. or how serious they are taken to be.. but it was easier first to write in a generalised manner than makin any out right comments on them..
and the whole point being how ppl actually look into their relationship and the way they handle it.. be it a marriage or having a baby..
glad u liked the posts :)
Shajji
hehe yes u can.. lol.. thats mee.. ;)
yup babies.. are just awesomeeeee
hehe dowryy.. nope no comments on that one..
hehe unless am getting something.. then ohhh yehhh lol..
will try to watch the video.. if its crying.. err then wont..
shajjii
i have heard this..
it is quite touchin , isnt it..
i love westlife.. oh well thank u for the song..
Marriage is a gamble anyways :)
Keshi.
keshi..
thats true.. everyone hopes its absolute bliss.. till the end..or when ever time it lasts :)
lol! that was quick, I almost thought this wud result in the next 14 years :)
Marriage. Not an expert dear. Seen the best and the worst around me.
Awwww babies, now this is what I cud talk a lot. I just love them and I so wanna have mine soon. What would be a greater joy than give life - our privilege entirely.
Still Thinking
hehe 14years.. hehe i wish my parents were that understanding.. oh well..
but then i thought this was an apt post after what i wrote previously..
yup babies are soooo cuuutteee..
go on about babies.. would love to hear what u got to say about them.. :).. so when are u going to have urs? yes it will be a lovely privilege that we and only we have..
Ani rite now 2 of my good friends r going thru a bitter Separation...after 10yrs of Marriage and 2 very young kids. yday they had a Hearing in the family courts...the guy won the case, the woman lost...she left the courts bursting into tears. She may lose part custody of her own kids.(they r an Indian couple btw)
When I witness such things I really wonder if Marriage is so romantic as it sounds. Not all marriages r gory, I know that. But its far from wut we single girls think it is...there's alot of UNDERSTANDING thats needed before we commit. 2 ppl need to know each other well and be READY for Marriage before jumping into it thinking its gonna be all rosy all the way.
Keshi.
The baby cartoons were too cute. I share ur thoughts totally.No wonder people develop second thoughts when makin a commitment as big as a marriage. Good post dear....
keshi..
i feel so sorry for the kids more than the two individuals now.. because they would be having there love divided and also the attention and all the togetherness lost..
its such a shame when kids are involved in separation.. i am not putting any blame on the individuals .. just that its too difficult for a child to cope.. and sometimes that could lead to a complete change in their behaviour..
you would sometimes wonder what made them get separated.. because u would have always seen them happy and such a meant to be couple ( atleast thats what they try to protray to ppl outside ) but then there might be like i said the loss of that understanding between them.. which is the whole point which keeps relationship going..
if there isn't that understanding .. then it makes sense to be separate and be at peace.. too bad that they have kids and they have to involve kids..
i have seen instances were separated couples rejoin as a family for the sake of the kids and they try to make things work out and try harder.. and guess what things have worked out.. so who knows..
its just the state of mind and heart.. because for you know they could get remarried with in no time.. if they are willing to do so.. and want to do so..
Chaggoholic
hehe thank u..
yeh committment is such a big word..and yes all of us would think a lot about it before we take the plunge.. because most of us would want it to be the ever type.. no one would just be like..
oh yeh lets see.. how long it will last.. no.. no one says that..
heart of hearts all of us want it to be for ever..
marriage n babies are quite big :)
LOL0 loved the cartoons, sometime back there wa sa serial on Tv --Chote muh badi baat, where the tiny tots thought were shown, it was hilarious:)
very logical thoughts on marriage, personally i feel that do all the thinking before marriage, once married, make it work:)
Yes Ani...I really feel sad for the kids too. We hv known this young family for the last 7yrs or so. They had some great times...and the lil one is just 3yrs old. When I think abt the good times they've had, I really wonder WHY and HOW it came to THIS!
Keshi.
ahh seems like u did lotta research for this one ..gud :P
nice definitions ans quotes there !!
happy blogging !
hey If u have orkut account then plzz join this community for blogger friends created by me
jus copy and paste the link in ur browser
http://www.orkut.co.in/Main#Community.aspx?cmm=50554640
Renu
Thank u for dropping by..
glad u liked the post.. and yes i do remember the serial that u were talking about.. it was so funny to see it.. and one would actually wonder if thats what babies were thinking.. :)
and i do agree with what u said.. think before marriage.. and then after marriage makes things work.. question is what if it doesnt work.. ?
keshi
i understand what u mean dear.. because i was in the same situation with couple of my family friends.. but then one of them actually got back.. well its actually the kids who made sure that the parents get back.. and they do all kind of tricks to get them back.. and the parents were still unattached.. so it was nice to see things work out..
who knows.. here as well things could fall into place later on..
things are always not how it seems..
peter
hehe this is such a generic topic. check out my previous post.. hehe u might find that more interesting than this one..
and thank u..
yeh i do have an orkut account.. so will add up the community there.. :) thank u so much for the invite :)
I think that 70 % of problems can be solved if the couple has positive thinking and love each other and divorce must be the last resort only.Life is a difficult journey with many hurdles. but its upto us to make it pleasant and memorable.Compromise and adjustments are not always bad words:)
Renu..
the only problem is half the ppl.. or rather most of the ppl who think of separation dont realise this.. by then they end up having their own ego's involved.. which doesnt leave space for any positive thinking.. or to remember about the love that they once shared..
before thinking of separation, one must have a period of six months living separately and with none of the negative people around(I mean sometimes family and friends make a amarriage, but sometimes they break also). and in that period if somebody feels like missing the other, separation is not worth it:)
Renu
that was such a lovely example.. reallyy too good..
and yes separation are always not good..
ever wondered why when we interchange two letters marital becomes martial? >:D
well, i have nothing against marriage..i m all for marriage...but i do believe in giving my partner all the space she wants...or doesnt want...as the case may be...
and about babies...
we all tend to become children in front of them...just to eke out a lil cutey smile out of the lil ones...:D
therez really some magic in those toothless smiles...hehe
humbl devil
thats nice.. ppl do need their space.. the me time.. but lotss of me time is also bad.. it should be balanced out equally..
n thats an interesting observations.. :) never thought of equating martial and marital.. hehe
babies.. yup u do become a kid to get that smile out from them.. or especially when ur trying to feed them..
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